“Life is beautiful”. We all have heard it and experienced it occasionally. But even after knowing this and having a few experiences, we never acknowledge this beauty in our everyday lives. Because we live in a world where we have lot of expectations from ourselves and we want to see ourselves fulfilling those expectations. Trying to perfect each moment and our lives, we never live the present. And the truth is that we are trying too hard. We always have so much to do and so much to accomplish that we end up converting our desires into our responsibilities.
In the process of attempting to fulfil these responsibilities (towards family, work etc) we forget we also have a responsibility towards ourselves – to be peaceful and happy. Our quest for happiness through others becomes dependent on how our relationships are, how our job is, and/or any other external factor that affects us directly in daily life. Our life eventually becomes reliant on external situations. The tentacles of control slowly creep within us.
Right from the time of our birth, expectations become an integral part of us. We are expected to do everything perfectly and we don’t give ourselves the liberty to learn from what we are experiencing in each moment. Any role we play – be it as a student, employee, entrepreneur, parent, spouse, sibling etc, we are constantly trying to be the best in all spheres. Our focus is on becoming or doing everything perfectly rather than living each moment completely. We strive to put our stamp as being the role model for others in each of these responsibilities.
The alter-ego presents another question: How do we live each moment completely if we do not like it and want to change it by controlling it?
But isn’t living each moment completely, without any judgment, the focal point of life? Can our life be stagnant when we keep passing through different phases of life?
How are we going to know that we dislike something till we experience it fully? We judge too quickly and want to change or move away from the situation, person or thing we believe is unacceptable.
Why it is that one person is affected by another person or situation but the same situation or person does not have any kind of effect on the other person?
We get affected because we do not accept the situation or other person as it is. We expect universe to be fair with us without we being fair with ourselves. We have created a life of hardships for us and we are indulging in a race towards some unknown destination.
Ironically, we are fighting for something unknown rather than living in the current moment. We forget to appreciate and/or accept the existing state of our lifestyle that has contributed to what we are and what we have. If we pause for a moment and look our life closely, then we recognise that we are running within a vicious cycle of chasing the unknown with the myth of destination always remaining distant. We keep facing the difficulties repeatedly via different situations or people.
For example – If someday we feel that we are not good enough then we keep meeting all those people who present sufficient evidence of my inferiority belief in as much as we see them having an ideal life and accomplishing things, which we always wanted to accomplish. And this further increases our misery of being at below par, which in turn compels us to commit mistakes in our tasks and we will actually end up proving ourselves and others that we are not good enough.
Each particle and atom of the whole universe including us is energy. We all are energy. Our beliefs, ideologies, what we think about others or ourselves, what we eat everything contributes to our energy. We attract what we are.
For example – I may believe and often hear that I am a happy go lucky or a positive person but I also keep attracting people who might be depressed or angry or may be full of negativity and their state makes me want to cheer them up or it made me sad or I try to run away from them saying he/she is toxic etc., this situation points out that may be I have some suppressed emotions in me which are taking shape of anger or depression as I am not dealing with them directly. Also, just like we flush out toxins from our body similarly rather than saying other person being toxic, we ought to work on our negative beliefs and detoxify our soul.
As mentioned earlier, we are running a race towards unknown destination- most of us will say we know where we have to reach and we reach there but even before we reach to that destination, we would have already planned another one for us and so on, thus making this race never ending and without any direction.
All we are doing is running away from ourselves. Whoever and whatever comes in our life reflects back our energy but we run away saying, it’s them not me. When we get tired of this running we take a vacation where we even for a few days live with ourselves and feel rejuvenated. If living with ourselves makes us so energetic and peaceful think what it would be like if we can experience being content in each moment of our life. We have so many destination and goals but not a single one is to make us happy or to be ourselves.
Who says, that “my goal in life is to be peaceful”? We cannot deny that we lack peace but we never uphold the importance of peace in our life.
We perceive that our happiness lies by making our family, spouse, child etc happy. However, a person who is not at peace internally or in a mode of unhappiness can never sustain happiness in the other’s life. Only when we are happy and peaceful within self we can experience the same through everyone around us else even if we make everyone around us happy the emptiness or unhappiness we carry within will make it momentary for others as well. We all are One. Our core is One. When we understand this, we see us in everything and everyone around which in turn helps us to accept all our situations as it is. Consequently, when we accept everything and everyone as me there is no space for conflict. Conflict only creates misery and conflict only exists in the battle for accepting or not accepting our situation.
“The world is my Representation” as propounded by Arthur Schopenhauer in one of his famous works, simply means that we see, hear, and experience in reality of what we perceive in the mind or the will. Once we learn to acknowledge, own and accept our inner beliefs reflecting as current reality in our life, then our choice of experiencing peace, love and happiness becomes more than evident and radiates its beauty from all corners of the world.